Sitting on the stairs of my church these words were birthed freely from my impregnated thoughts onto paper. The notion has long been dismissed as an excuse. Please have the maturity not to take it that way. 
My parents were married in the church I now attend. I was dedicated there. I was baptized there. My first mission trip was sent out from there, my dreams and purpose has been cultivated there. I was born there. I grew up there. I've never known anything else. It's been the biggest part of my life in accordance with my heart, mind, and actions.
I've subconsciously souvenired the memory of an instance that replays itself from time to time in my unfocused mind. The hierarchy of classes for children at my church at the time staired from Pre-church, "Soul" Church, and Kids Church. "Soul Church" was my rank and I was being escorted by my mother from the classroom after service. Undoubtedly playing with my clip-on tie as we walked through the breezeway towards the parking lot. I held a small animated pamphlet detailing basics for a "born-again" life that I never read. "Guess what" I would ask my mother. "What?" she would ask me. "I got saved today," I would answer. Then she would say, "Again?"
While my caring mother remembered an apparent time before, this is my first memory of proclaiming salvation. You can understand that this left a questioning thread in my mind. Had I already made the "life-changing" decision? The thunder was taken from me amidst confusion and shrugging shoulders and the event went from an entire chapter to a mere subscript in the books. And so, I've always been saved.
Recently a missionary spoke at my church and he told the story of a baptism they had in a river. His son who attended, but did not participate was quoted to have said something along the lines of "I want to get baptized-ed, it looks fun." Besides laughter the reply from his father is remembered by me as "There are a few things we have to do first before baptism." I was silently surprised at this. I'm not sure, but could it be that this means his son has not yet prayed the sinner's prayer? Could it mean, that because he does not yet have a full grasp of the situation, that he is not yet making the choice? Could it mean that he is not repeating words that he has no grasp upon in order to give him a little ease from nightmares? Is it possible that under godly influence from his parents and others that he will someday make the desicion to completely turn from sin and dedicate his life to the Lord? I think it's very possible and I think it's honorable.
From experience, that system beats going through life and getting "saved" countless times. The true salvation experience has been lacking in me for sometime. I'll never have that one beautiful, defining, real moment that I turn my life from dedication to sin and follow God with an uncommon fervency.
Abraham Lincoln said this, "It is difficult to make a man miserable while he feels worthy of himself and claims kindred to the great God who made him." He's right. I've never denied God, so I've never truly felt like one of this world, but I have oft denied his commands. Verses from Jeremiah chapter three verses four and five remark my mental side-thoughts to God during these confused times:
"Yet you say to me, 'Father, you have been my guide since the days of my youth. Surely you won't be angry about such a little thing! Surely you can forget it!' So you talk and you keep right on doing all the evil you can."
And so the ugly cycle will continue until these words from the prophet are relayed to you and you realize your folly.
There are some things you should learn alone. You have to trust God to draw one in with his power and not your own. He can. A forcible entry always does damage. Once again that is not to excuse myself. I am a born-again, saved child of God, and I can make my own decisions. All blame shifts only to myself.
Again, make no mistake, I'm all for instilling children with a firm foundation early on. Without my parents constant preaching of right and wrong and Christ's sacrifice for us, God knows where I would be today. Only would I warn not to hurry them through the most important desicion of their lives.
My parents were married in the church I now attend. I was dedicated there. I was baptized there. My first mission trip was sent out from there, my dreams and purpose has been cultivated there. I was born there. I grew up there. I've never known anything else. It's been the biggest part of my life in accordance with my heart, mind, and actions.
I've subconsciously souvenired the memory of an instance that replays itself from time to time in my unfocused mind. The hierarchy of classes for children at my church at the time staired from Pre-church, "Soul" Church, and Kids Church. "Soul Church" was my rank and I was being escorted by my mother from the classroom after service. Undoubtedly playing with my clip-on tie as we walked through the breezeway towards the parking lot. I held a small animated pamphlet detailing basics for a "born-again" life that I never read. "Guess what" I would ask my mother. "What?" she would ask me. "I got saved today," I would answer. Then she would say, "Again?"
While my caring mother remembered an apparent time before, this is my first memory of proclaiming salvation. You can understand that this left a questioning thread in my mind. Had I already made the "life-changing" decision? The thunder was taken from me amidst confusion and shrugging shoulders and the event went from an entire chapter to a mere subscript in the books. And so, I've always been saved.
Recently a missionary spoke at my church and he told the story of a baptism they had in a river. His son who attended, but did not participate was quoted to have said something along the lines of "I want to get baptized-ed, it looks fun." Besides laughter the reply from his father is remembered by me as "There are a few things we have to do first before baptism." I was silently surprised at this. I'm not sure, but could it be that this means his son has not yet prayed the sinner's prayer? Could it mean, that because he does not yet have a full grasp of the situation, that he is not yet making the choice? Could it mean that he is not repeating words that he has no grasp upon in order to give him a little ease from nightmares? Is it possible that under godly influence from his parents and others that he will someday make the desicion to completely turn from sin and dedicate his life to the Lord? I think it's very possible and I think it's honorable.
From experience, that system beats going through life and getting "saved" countless times. The true salvation experience has been lacking in me for sometime. I'll never have that one beautiful, defining, real moment that I turn my life from dedication to sin and follow God with an uncommon fervency.
Abraham Lincoln said this, "It is difficult to make a man miserable while he feels worthy of himself and claims kindred to the great God who made him." He's right. I've never denied God, so I've never truly felt like one of this world, but I have oft denied his commands. Verses from Jeremiah chapter three verses four and five remark my mental side-thoughts to God during these confused times:
"Yet you say to me, 'Father, you have been my guide since the days of my youth. Surely you won't be angry about such a little thing! Surely you can forget it!' So you talk and you keep right on doing all the evil you can."
And so the ugly cycle will continue until these words from the prophet are relayed to you and you realize your folly.
There are some things you should learn alone. You have to trust God to draw one in with his power and not your own. He can. A forcible entry always does damage. Once again that is not to excuse myself. I am a born-again, saved child of God, and I can make my own decisions. All blame shifts only to myself.
Again, make no mistake, I'm all for instilling children with a firm foundation early on. Without my parents constant preaching of right and wrong and Christ's sacrifice for us, God knows where I would be today. Only would I warn not to hurry them through the most important desicion of their lives.
Thank you for sharing that, Mitch. It really helped me with something that's going on in my life.
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